Candid Chatter

Just Say It

Chopped Snake April 25, 2008

Filed under: Life... The Way I See It — candidchatter @ 1:01 pm

By now you’re all familiar with my lack of love for animals.

Well, I absolutely DESPISE reptiles and insects even more so. Yesterday my two darling children were trying to catch lovebugs in our backyard and stumbled upon a snake. Literally stumbled upon one. My daughter came over to me with fright on her face and said, “mommy, there’s a snake over there”. I jumped up like bionic woman and ran as fast as superman can fly over to the scene. My two year old was about 2 feet away from it looking at it intently. “Get back Jeremy”, I shouted. Maybe I screamed it because he took off like a rocket with tears in his eyes.

It wasn’t moving. I said, “Brianna did it move? It looks dead.” She said, “mommy it tried to bite me.” I think I sucked in my breath right then and held it until the finale. I grabbed them both and went inside to wake up my sleeping husband and told him to get outside right now and be a hero. Kill the snake!

We went back outside to stare at the snake some more; from a safe distance, of course. The hero man comes out with a shovel. I said, “kill it honey, you can do it, chop its head off” [everyone needs a cheerleader]. The kids were enthralled. So he WHACKED it. The thing flipped in the air and I screamed which made Jeremy cry which made Brianna suck in her breath and turn pale as snow white. He WHACKED it again and this time cut the sucker right in half. I think I almost vomited then. I had to turn my head. The neighbor who is building a house next door poked his head out to see the death blow and he grinned from ear to ear. Turns out he, too, hates snakes.

“Yay, daddy killed the snake, Ew that’s gross, wow daddy you chopped his head off”. The body of it writhed for about a minute even after it was dead. I almost tossed the contents of my stomach again. How am I going to be a nurse? Oh boy!

I shoveled the head over the fence into the vacant lot beside us. I made the hero man take the body and fling it over.

Rich Reed = Higglytown Hero

PS: It didn’t look like this. But this snake gives me the heebie jeebies! {spine shivers}


4 Responses to “Chopped Snake”

  1. Lana Says:

    so, are you saying the mothballs didn’t work?

  2. candidchatter Says:

    Hi out of town friend! Miss you!!

    No, well, maybe? The moth balls are on the side where the empty lot is. I didn’t put them around the back or the side where the building is going on. I plan to do that soon. The snake was on the side of the house where the building is going on. So???

    But how funny that you killed one, your friend killed one, and now Rich killed one all w/in weeks of each other. It made me laugh!

  3. Jen Says:

    Yuck! You were braver than me. I think I would’ve gotten my husband before I went to look at it…just in case.

  4. candidchatter Says:

    Jen: Hi. Thanks for stopping by. I normally would have gone to get Rich first, but my 2 year old was still over by the snake. That’s why I catapulted from my seat on the porch to the snake site. I had to save the wee one.

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