My brother “R” and I had so much fun together this past weekend. He is all of 22 years old and more funny than I can describe. He has a great sense of humor and he loves cars more than I do. We spent a lot of time together. The one benefit of not being in my sister’s wedding was that I got to spend time with people I wouldn’t have been able to had I been busy getting myself all glammed for her wedding. “R” was one of them.
So here’s the funny stuff (and it’s gross too so if you have a weak stomach skip this part). We both had gas really badly. Mine is mostly due to being pregnant. Seems I can get gas from water right now. I have perfected fart etiquette. I just walk away from the crowd and let ‘er rip as I go. I had to do this several times during my trip. It’s life for pregnant women. Men who are married to women who have been pregnant are nodding their heads right now.
Well “R” would walk up to me and say, “I just dropped one so don’t walk behind me.” I’d laugh and say, “well, since you mentioned it, you might not want to get too close.” We’d laugh. Brother and sister stuff just like when we were younger.
Well I ran into a situation. For some reason, a couple of days this week/weekend I was a bit stopped up, if you know what I mean. I definitely don’t have this problem in my normal physical state. Regular. Ok, so I had to go finally. We were at the reception and I walked into the bathroom hoping it was empty. It wasn’t. Darn. I walked out, waited close by for a couple ladies to exit. When they did I walked back in and sat down all ready to relieve my poor self. I saw these beautiful, shiny red high heel shoes underneath the stall next to mine. Dang it!!! I decided since she didn’t see me come in that I would just hold it until she left. So I sat there. Hmmm. She’s still there. Tick tock. Quiet. Nothing. Shoot. She must be doing the same thing. Waiting to poop so nobody knows it was her. Crap! Well, I have strong stomach muscles so we’ll just sit here until she leaves, even if it takes all night. Finally she tinkled. LOL! I was so glad. She washed her hands and I was able to get on with it. Ahhhh. Sweet relief. I washed my hands and left.
Later my aunt pointed out those pretty red shoes. Ha!! I got to see who wore them. A woman at least 20 years my senior and I didn’t know her. Turns out the younger one with the stronger muscles wins! Tee hee.
So is this a problem for anyone else? Will you just poop in a public restroom with reckless abandon or will you hold it? Are you concerned that someone might know it was you? Is this a girl thing or a universal thing?
Let’s talk about poop.