Candid Chatter

Just Say It

Black Friday November 28, 2008

Filed under: Life... The Way I See It — candidchatter @ 2:35 am

us-crowdedshoppingmall-xl

You will not catch me out shopping today. I worked in retail jewelry for 7 years. I would rather poke a 400 degree sharp piece of lead through both of my eyes than go shopping on the day after Thanksgiving. Mmm Hmm. It’s not worth the $25.00 I may (or may not) save. Want to know the truth? You won’t save a dime today. You won’t. Sure the sales are fantastic. Sure the deals are phenomenal. Sure. But you will buy more than you bargained for and you will end up spending more than you planned. Why? Because that is what this day is designed to do… make you spend more money.

But for those of you die hards who swear by shopping on the biggest retail day of the year, here is some advice.

  • Remember that every single clerk you come in contact with is already sick of Christmas. They are working extra hours. Our local mall will open at 4:00 a.m. this year. That means most of the employees will be there by 3:00 a.m. meaning they will wake up somewhere around 2:00 a.m. to come in and try to serve you. They are tired. They are sick of the complaints. They hate the customers already and there is still almost an entire month to go until the madness ends. Treat them with kid gloves.
  • Remember your manners. Don’t cut in line. Don’t run your cart into the old lady who takes up the entire middle of the aisle and walks slower than a snail. Try very hard not to grit your teeth. Maybe sing a little Christmas jingle to make your spirits bright. If that doesn’t work, take a thermos filled with Kahlua and coffee. That will settle your frayed nerves.
  • If they don’t have what you came for don’t complain. You will find a lot of stock running out. Especially if you wait until Sunday to shop. Seriously though — they’ll get more in next week. Just go home, pop a Valium, watch some football, and be merry.

There you go. From a retail veteran. My best advice though?

STAY HOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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8 Responses to “Black Friday”

  1. Thanks for the advice…but I really didn’t need it…I have no despair to be with 10s of thousands of crazy people who are angry that the $50 camera has sold out (normally $55)…when the ad clearly said there would be limited supply–but, the shopper didn’t think that the words limited supply applied to their product!

  2. candidchatter Says:

    Steve: Ever work in retail? Sounds like you have. It’s horrible this time of year.

    Oh — and skip Toys R Us today. Their ads are misleading and someone is going to get shot by the frazzled manager. I just know it. There will be blood and hostages. Just stay away.

    Heidi

  3. Worked in retail for a while during high school…but, remember, I was a pastor…always had to put a smile on my face and pretend that I was happy and loved everyone! ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. candidchatter Says:

    Yeah, I can imagine that is one of the hardest jobs on the planet. I have a few friends who are married to pastors. They live in fishbowls. Tough.

    Heidi

  5. Tony York Says:

    I went to work. Its very quiet here… “I think I’m alone now, doesn’t seem to be anyone around.” (Little 80’s flashback… actually, I think the first version came out in the 60’s or 70’s)

  6. Lorna Says:

    “take a thermos filled of Kaluha and coffee” LOL. So that’s what the lady was drinking that was so cheerful. Actually I’d rather just sit at home and do my shopping from my computer. People in large groups scare me. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  7. bub Says:

    Pretty accurate prediction on the Toy’s R us. When I read that I kinda went, ooooh, creepy. Here’s a link to the story. http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20081129/ap_on_re_us/toy_store_shooting I was in that mess this morning, but I wasn’t too bitter, lol Yay God!!!

  8. debateur Says:

    Very good advise. I used to work retail and used to just want to jump off a bridge at that time of the year.


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