Ever have this happen to you?
You do something wrong. You feel guilty. You try not to feel guilty because you are trying to justify your actions. You still feel guilty. You pray. You feel convicted. You finally realize God is right and you are wrong. You decide to humble yourself and swallow your pride. You apologize.
You’re still angry and you still cannot stand the person you offended.
And that person hasn’t openly forgiven you anyway.
What do you do with that?
When you’re a married couple you can get a divorce or dissolution. I’ve been down that road. My first husband and I dissolved our marriage claiming “irreconcilable differences”. I wanted nothing from him. He wanted nothing from me. We had no property or children between us. It was pretty easy. It was good enough for the lawyer. It was good enough for the judge. That and $500 got me the freedom I so desired. Done. Signed. Have a nice new life.
But in a family or a friendship what do you do? I tend to leave it be and decide “I did my part. If they refuse to forgive me and take steps to reconcile the relationship then that’s their problem. The ball is in their court now.” Seriously. That’s how I’ve handled it and I’ve been quite fine with that. Not another thought about the incident enters my mind until someone reminds me about it. I simply move on.
But is that ok? Is that immature? Is it wise?
I’m not sure.
Especially if I’m still angry about it and if I still refuse to treat the relationship as if it was healed.