Candid Chatter

Just Say It

I Salute You February 14, 2009

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To all the single moms and dads out there… I salute you.

For the past year, my husband has worked so many hours that I have felt the majority of the time that I am a single parent. I hope that doesn’t sound insensitive to a single parent’s situation. I mean no disrespect. It’s just that I am really tired. I can imagine how hard single parenting really is.

When my husband works so much that my kids only see him for 5 minutes in the morning Monday through Friday, I feel very alone. We get him all day on Saturday, thank God. Sunday he serves all morning at the church. By the time he gets home, the kids are in bed for their naps. They only get to see him about 5 hours on Sundays because of this conflict in his schedule. I half begged him last week to quit the ministry he volunteers for. We need him home. I need him home.

I am thankful that I don’t really know what it’s like to be completely on my own with my three kids. But I want you single parents to know that I think of you and I completely take off my hat to you. Your job, my friends, is the hardest job on the planet.

I salute you.

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7 Responses to “I Salute You”

  1. Tausha Says:

    Heidi-
    I hear you. My husband is around a lot more know, but for a while he was always gone! He would travel for business about 3 weeks out of the month.
    I HATED IT!!!
    I too felt like a single mom. I can’t even imagine how hard it must be for the incredible women who do the single mom every single day. I too salute them!
    Great post. I don’t think that there is anything wrong with needing your husband. If you don’t have your family, what do you have?
    I never answered your question about the hair product.
    Sorry-but now I am ready to share. Are you ready? Of course you are-stupid question. Soryy.
    Alterna-this product line should so be in your bathroom. Your shower for shampoo and coditioner-Caviar is the bomb!
    Also they have molding mud. It’s in a maroon container and kind of has a sticky lotion texture. Does that make sense?
    They also have a voumizing mouse that rocks!!! You spray it on your roots where you need the lift-usually in the crown.
    I spray it in my hands and work it through the roots when my hair is a little bit longer like it is now. Longer meaning-short, more along the lines of Posh’s hair.

    Another one-pureology. they have a texture twist that rocks your world. I use the alterna mud before I flat iron and this after. This is an awesome peicer. It makes your hair do what you want. Plus-it will hold up in humidity. I had great hair when I was on vakay in cali.
    You want to use something on your hair before you flat iron. It protects it so you don’t get the yucky, dried out ends.
    Pureolgy also makes a fantastic shine spray.
    Both of these lines are for professionals. My sis does hair so that is how I get my hands on it. But most good salons will carry these lines.
    I am sure that you can find it online as well.
    Another awesome line, that we can’t get right now is MOP.
    There stuff is all natural and works fantastically. We love all their stuff.
    So-know that I have taken up your whole day because you were reading my novel of a comment.
    I am serious-these products really work. Trust me, I have tried them all! Plus-they help the color stay more true and longer.
    PS-if you can get some morrocan hair oil-oh yea-thats the good stuff too.
    If you have any questions, just ask. I am no pro-but I do love hair. I am so not saying this to sound conceited-other people seem to like my hair as well.
    So-go forth and funk up your hair, then take a picture and post so I can see it!!!
    Happy Valentines Day!

  2. candidchatter Says:

    Tausha: Thank you for all of the product advice. I’ll check out every single one. I know with this short hair style I’ll need stuff that will hold it in place. There is almost nothing that irks me more than having hair in my face all day long. If it won’t stick, I’ll get it cut even shorter so here’s hoping something works.

    Heidi

  3. jimmy paravane Says:

    My granddaughter was at church yesterday with her dad. Her mom got to sleep in for Valentine’s day. She sat by her grandmother and I for about 10 minutes and then sat by her dad the entire time after that. Probably bored out of her mind by all the adult church stuff. But her dad held her the entire time and she leaned her head on him. I forget sometimes how hard her dad works to support his family, and how much of his time that takes up.

  4. candidchatter Says:

    Jimmy: That was a beautiful comment. My husband works his tail off so that I can stay at home to raise these gorgeous kids of ours. Sacrifice after sacrifice he makes in order to give us all a good life. These years go by so quickly though and it makes me wish with all my heart that he was around more so that he wouldn’t miss out on so much. He worked from home for over 2 years and even though he was always (ALWAYS) working he got to interact with his children day in and day out. It was fantastic. I know he misses them as much as they (and I) miss him. Such is life.

    Heidi

  5. Cynthia Says:

    Oh Heidi, my friend, I’ve been in your shoes. Chris was gone months at a time, only coming home every other weekend. I know what it’s like! He was gone nearly every major holiday! I know what it’s like to feel like a single parent even though I truly wasn’t. I thank God for a great family & friends who helped on occasion. Chris changed jobs when Tristan was 8 months old, because he basically had missed the first 7 months of his life. He still has some long hours and has to go out of town on occasion, but it is nothing like before. Is there a certain time of day when it’s the worst? Around late afternoon and evening was the worst time for me. Let me know, so I can pray for you specifically at that time!

  6. candidchatter Says:

    Cynthia, girl, you are wonderful to offer to do that for me. 🙂 Thank you!! Evenings are the worst. Around 6:00, as the sun starts to fade, I get really tired. I think my subconscious mind decides “ok I’ve had enough of being sleep deprived — it’s dark out — let’s shut down”. That’s when I need to feed all three kids, give baths, and deal with them wanting Daddy in a big way. Usually around 6:00 is when Rich will call to tell me whether or not he’s working late. Lately, he’s worked late every weekday night. 😦 If he’s not working late, I also need to prepare our dinner. I feel the most stressed and the most in need of an extra pair of hands then. Once the kids are in bed (around 9:00), I can sit down and relax or go to bed myself. So any time btw 6pm and 9pm would be fantastic. Thank you times a billiongazillion!!!!

    Heidi

  7. Cynthia Says:

    That was about the same time for me too! You’re drained by that time and wanting some much needed relief! Wish I lived closer, but I’ll energize through prayer. That would be 5:00 – 8:00 our time. Hang in there!


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