What bounces off of me sticks to you!
I remember my Mom teaching me that chant. She was trying to help me through a rough patch of being called names at school. I’ve always been hurt by name calling. I happen to believe most people aren’t very good at letting it roll off their backs. For me, it’s a real struggle.
I’m not sure if it’s because of that sensitivity or what. But, I strive very hard to not call my kids names out of frustration or anger. I think the worst I have said is, “she’s being a brat”, in regards to Brianna’s behavior, which is not nice at all. I mean to stop that.
I’ve written about my deep-seated stance on never telling my kids they are bad. I’ve heard people call their kids bad this or bad that and it makes me cringe every single time. I reserve the word for training animals. My kids are not animals. And, I have no animals, so that word is not frequently used in my house; especially not to describe a child. But, that’s me.
Saying “bad girl” or “bad boy” is nothing compared to verbally abusing your child.
Do you tell your child he’s stupid, ugly, worthless, a mistake, or that he will amount to nothing?
Do you say things like “you are just like your Father” with venom in your voice because you hate that child’s father?
Do you use curse words when disciplining (and I use that word loosely) your child?
“You’re an a-hole!”
“What a b*tch!”
“You f****ng loser!”
How about these words?
“Why can’t you be just like your sister?”
“Your brother is so much better than you!”
“You were a mistake!”
“I hate you!”
“Nobody loves you, not even me!”
“I wish you were dead!”
Wanna know something? Every single word that comes out of your mouth towards your children is meant to do one of two things; build them up or tear them down. Think before you speak.
What are your words doing to your child?