What do you fear?
My biggest fears involve my kids and my husband. Everything else trickles down the line from there.
For my own personal reference, I fear being raped or tortured. I fear drowning and burning.
There are other fears that fill my thoughts occasionally. I fear being out of control. I fear certain political decisions being made. I fear nuclear war. I fear diseases. I fear no forgiveness. I fear lost relationships.
But, one thing I don’t fear… and I can’t sympathize with people who do fear it… is medical intervention.
Surgery. Medication. Doctors. Nurses. Hospitals.
And so on.
I am starting to see this fear show up in the most unlikely of candidates. At least, I would have never thought these people fear it. Strong women. Strong men. Yet, they fear.
One woman I know cannot step foot into a hospital without major self-encouragement or she will faint. I’m talking the whole scenario with all the drama. Sometimes she will just vomit. Other times, if she doesn’t see anything that causes her stomach to roll (and that could be as simple as an empty gurney), she is fine. But, she can’t stay long.
Another fears certain methods of giving birth. She will push that baby out med-free without blinking an eye, but set her up for an IV or a c-section and she is completely gripped with fear.
A man I know fears needles. Little tiny needles. Big man. Little needles. Panic.
I once saw a man cry the night before his dental appointment. He hadn’t been in over 20 years and was freaked out about the sounds and smells and the stupid mask the dentist wears, of all things.
I don’t understand it. I have a really hard time sympathizing with these people. However, I am starting to think I better at least pay attention and acknowledge these fears. I want to be a nurse afterall. If I don’t recognize and show compassion for these very real fears, I am going to fail a patient who has this very fear.
I imagine a woman who needs surgery who hates hospitals. I might have to hug that woman. I might have to reassure her. I might be the one person in the hospital who can help make her fears subside for her stay.
I imagine a woman who fears a c-section having an emergency and needing that baby out as fast as possible feeling like she has failed and being extremely upset and terrified about what will transpire in the limited amount of time she’ll have during prep before surgery. What will go through her mind? How will she feel when she isn’t the first one to hold her baby? What emotional turmoil will she experience when she realizes she won’t see her baby after birth because she’s knocked unconscious? How compassionate will I have to be towards her?
What about the man who needs blood drawn for a series of tests who shakes at the prospect of being poked with a needle?
Or the one who fears a doctor or dentist because of a past childhood experience?
How about the person who has always treated ailments holistically who now needs a harsh round of chemotherapy in order to live? The person who fears medication…
I think being a nurse will set me up for some serious challenges and stretching of my own mind and heart in the years to come. What better way to prepare for missions?
I want to be a nurse.
So that I can be a medical missionary.
God has a plan.