Candid Chatter

Just Say It

Achievement August 15, 2010

Touted as the most extreme home fitness program, P90X definitely delivers. I have done my fair share of home and gym workouts over the years. And, I dislike the gym… strongly & passionately. However, I have always enjoyed exercising at home and from time to time I’ve also stomached a fitness class (spinning, aerobics, and Yoga are the ones I’ve tried personally).

But sticking a DVD into my player and doing a solid workout on my own time with no travel involved, no smelly locker room, no guys hitting on me, no half-naked girls working the room, and no worries about child care — well, there’s just something about it that appeals to me. I payed attention for several months on Facebook to a few friends who bought into the trendy infomercial workout series. I watched for their status updates daily hoping they’d shed some “real life” light on the P90X revolution. Quickly, I noticed many of them stopped talking about it altogether. I wondered if it was because they were bored with it. I had visions of Tae Bo in my head, the world’s most repetitive and boring home workout to hit VHS (I’m not sure if it ever made it to DVD — ha ha).

One day a childhood neighborhood friend of mine announced that she was indeed still on the program and only had 2 weeks left. I picked her brain to pieces. I wanted so many questions answered and she was very patient and honest with me, God bless her. I decided to buy into all the hype and give it a go.

That was 90 days ago.
I’m going to cry. Real tears even.

Today, I have completed the absolute most difficult home workout system I have ever tried. I’ll never forget that first day when I swore I was going to puke about 20 minutes into the workout and almost cried when I realized I had 40 minutes to go. Heaving at the end, I called my husband to tell him how much I loved it. I felt like I had just been beaten to a pulp and I loved it. Say what? Love???

Yes. Love.

Betcha I can do more push-ups than you (with more variety).
Betcha I am more flexible than you.
Betcha I can do more jumping jacks than you (ever try a wacky jack?).
Betcha I have better form than you (you should see my tricep dips).
I betcha…

I have achieved great results using the P90X workout system. When I started I was a size 12 with joint and foot problems. As I type this, I am a comfortable size 8 (in only 13 weeks) and I have zero foot issues and very minimal knee problems.

Achievement. Fitness is important to me for many reasons. I am so excited I have completed this system. I “brought it” every single day and dripped sweat and was sore for days (and weeks) and some days was just so exhausted. It was worth it. I worked out when I was sick and on my monthly cycle and when I hadn’t had much sleep. I pushed play on days I was in such a bad mood nothing made me happy. I kept going and never quit. I did not give up.

I did it.

What next? Well, I’m taking a 3 week break from P90X and extreme fitness. I’ll mix it up for a little while with Tabata training, weights, and Pilates. Then, starting in the beginning of September, I’m going to do another round of P90X.

Size 8 is awesome and I feel like I could climb Mt. Everest.
However, I can do better than this.

Ha ha! So get ready for Round Two my friends.

Bring It!

By the way…
It’s not boring.
It’s just hard. 🙂


Remember Last Year? August 9, 2010

Me either.


What I mean is… remember last year when I said I would not eat meat unless it was seafood and I would concentrate on becoming more of a vegetarian? Well, here’s a reminder if you want to get yourself all up to speed (and here and here). I know I’m a little early in celebrating, but I didn’t want to forget to tell all of you that I have been a full pescetarian for (almost) a full year. Celebrate!

I have never felt better either. Hardly ever sick ‘cept for a seasonal cold now and then. Quite the difference from last year, wouldn’t ya say?

I am also exactly seven days away from finishing my first round of P90X. You can read more about that here.

I’m excited to start writing on my blog again. It will pick up soon. I am preparing for school to start so it’s hard to get the time to sit and focus on writing. However, with 2 kids in school and one who still takes naps… let the writing begin resume.


Getting ME Back September 20, 2009

So I go through periods of time (short, thankfully) where I feel downhearted. Not completely overwhelmed with depression, but feelings of darkness. The last two weeks have been like that. Sorta.

Last night I either had a dream or I had a moment of lucidity as I tossed back onto my back to keep the snot in my head and not on my pillow. I have a cold. Again.
So I had this moment of seeing myself; not as I am, but as I long to be.


I was fit. I had muscle tone. I had a tan. I was smiling. I had energy. I was full of life.
And, I realized right then and there that the person I was seeing IS me.
And, even though I’m going through this rough patch of feeling like my body has fallen apart, it really is just that… a rough patch. Because I am not comfortable with fat. I do not tolerate unhealthy. I am not lazy nor am I a glutton.

So I am over it. If you see me today, I am over 150 pounds. I feel fat. I feel ugly. I feel like I am barely making it most days because I have no energy and I keep getting sick. I have felt stuck in this yuck for over a year. And. I am SO done feeling this way.

I will breastfeed Jaxon for exactly 4 more months. I have to say that for the first 10 weeks I thought of breastfeeding as a loving sacrifice. After that, I felt extremely happy that I stuck it out because I started to really love it. In fact, I loved it so much that when I had to start feeding my son baby food from a jar I was upset and I cried because he wouldn’t need me at the breast as much. Now that he is 8 months old and I feel like half of a normal human being again, I want to be done. It is now just a convenience for me. I don’t see it necessary emotionally for either of us. It is the greatest form of nutrition for him and that I will never deny. But, emotionally we don’t need it anymore. It feels like I’m just feeding him now. I don’t know how to describe it, really. I guess “routine” is a good word to describe how it feels.

Anyway… I don’t consider nursing my son the reason for my downheartedness. Don’t get me wrong. But, the nursing has kept me in this state of being that I am unhappy with. I can’t take certain meds to feel better, it is taxing my immune system despite what you “experts” say, I am still  fat so the magic breastfeeding-makes-the-weight-melt-off is baloney in my book… and on and on. Because of the extra weight my foot is not healing the way it should. I can’t lose without using my foot. It’s a vicious cycle that is tiring me to the core.

And, before anyone starts  bashing me for eating fast food… find another chick to assault. I am a vegetarian 3/4 of the time. I only consume fish occasionally and my diet is well-rounded with my carbohydrate intake consisting primarily of fiber rich, whole grains and fruits. Save yourself the aggrivation of trying to pinpoint my problem as being anything other than breastfeeding. Pregnancy sucks and robs me of my nutrition and it has become apparant that breastfeeding does the same thing to me. It’s awful.

I didn’t realize until recently that one very important part of my mental well-being is my physical well-being. The two are intricately tied. Since I feel sluggish and I hate the way I look with my fat stomach and fat rear end… I am not healthy emotionally either.

Sure other things work their way into that equation, but the main thing is that I am physically unhealthy. Everything else is just another ingredient.


I am glad I see this now. It is relieving in a sense. I probably have about a year left of being “this” way physically. I am not done nursing Jack until January and, even then, weening is a process.

A woman once told me that it took her 3 years to get her body back after her last child was born. She breastfed too. I hope it doesn’t take 3 years. But, I will do what it takes to get mine back.

Healthy. Vibrant. Strong.
That is me. I am ready.


Bye Bye Red Meat August 18, 2009

As I’m reading more on the subject of vegetarianism, I am learning ways to get started on my journey to a meat-free way of life. The truth is, right now I am not ready to go cold turkey with the meat products. I have decided that after tonight’s meal I will not be eating red meat. I had a nice juicy grilled steak cooked medium rare on Saturday night. It was delicious too. Sunday night I had pizza with pepperoni. Tonight we’ll have a taco bake using ground beef (which could easily be subbed with ground chicken or turkey or just plain old refried beans). I am not a wasteful person and so I can’t just pitch all my red meat. However, after tonight it will be gone and I can send the leftovers with Rich to work.

Next on my list is going to be ridding my diet of all meat besides fish and seafood. Maybe in a few weeks. In the meantime, I will strive to have 2 or 3 all vegetarian days a week. Call it weening if you’d like. It’s sort of the same concept.

My hope is that one day I can become an authentic vegetarian. Maybe? I am struggling over the fish and seafood restriction. There are so many healthy benefits to having fish that eliminating it seems silly to me (since I am a person who isn’t striving to be a vegetarian b/c of the animals). Maybe I’ll be a pescetarian for awhile. I know that some people will say “not a real vegetarian”. Whatever. It is a step in the right direction, and I am willing to learn new ways of preparing food for myself and my family. Plus, I can’t imagine never eating sushi again. I love sushi!

So, that’s the plan as of today. I am looking forward to our trip to the farmer’s market. I was going to go this morning, but I think I’ll do my dry ingredient run to the regular grocery store today. I need some whole grains and I should probably pick up some tofu too. Oh, and fish. We are out of fish.

sushiWhat are you doing
to be a healthier you?


Blogger Fitness Challenge February 18, 2009

Filed under: fitness — candidchatter @ 5:54 am
Tags: , , , , , , ,


Check-in week 1.

I didn’t do as good as I intended this week. My mother-in-law had her wisdom teeth pulled and so she’s not been here helping. I knew she was helping a lot and keeping me sane, but I didn’t realize how much until a week without help. But we’re doing fine and my house isn’t the disaster I thought it would be. I’m even caught up on laundry. Yeehaw!


I didn’t lose any weight. I did get out and walk twice and jumped on the trampoline with the kids twice. I also paid more attention to my veggie intake. Overall, I am satisfied with my week. I am cutting myself some slack since I just gave birth a mere 5 weeks ago and had major abdominal surgery in order to do that.

How did you do?
Check In.


Blogger Fitness Challenge February 11, 2009

Filed under: fitness — candidchatter @ 6:00 am
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Ready. Begin!!

Wednesday will be the weekly check-in day for our online fitness challenge.

For today just state your goals. If you want to include your stats, by all means go right ahead. There are a few rules, but they are NOT rigid. The ultimate goal is for us to be healthier and happier. That’s it. Bottom line. This is not a competition. It is a motivator. That being said let’s get to the “rules”.

  • Check in once a week. You can tell how much weight you lost, how well you stuck to your diet plan, how much exercise you accomplished, what you’ve learned about yourself and your limits, how you pushed harder, how you quit diet soda and stepped up the water intake, how you feel, your victories, etc.
  • If your goal is to lose weight (like me), then please post how much you lost. Initially you might lose quite a chunk, but then it will taper off. Realistically, 2 to 3 pounds a week is awesome.
  • NO DIET PILLS. This is for our health. It’s not to end up in the ER with some sort of cardiac emergency because we were stupid and tried to lose like 40 pounds in 5 days. Be smart!!

Alright ladies and gentlemen — here’s to your health and mine. I’ll comment later on with my stats and goals. I’ll tell you this right now though — I am giving myself almost a full year. If I get there before Jaxon’s first birthday, awesome. But that’s my time frame. Good Luck!!



All Clear February 10, 2009

Filed under: Life... The Way I See It — candidchatter @ 5:51 am
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Saw the OB doc today. He was happy to see me and Jaxon again. He said the delivery and such was textbook, couldn’t have been easier, couldn’t have gone smoother. That made me happy.

All clear.

I can exercise and lift my children again and do all my normal daily life things. Four weeks and I’m tip top. Yeah!

Know what this means? I. Can. Exercise.

Did you read that?

Starting this Wednesday I will begin walking, Yoga, and Pilates. So that means I’ll do my best to check in every Wednesday with my progress.

Ready. Set. Let’s get in shape and lose some weight. GO!!!!!!!!!!!

Who is with me?